Ark Angel
by Cookie-Monster-in-Rehab
Summary: Disclaimer:This fanfic is based on Family Guy, Futurama and Red Dwarf. The characters in this fanfic are based on characters out of these three shows, cookie monster and greased up deaf guy are from family guy, Adam is based on fry and lister, norman is b


**Ark Angel**

Chapter One

All was quiet in St Bernard's Hospital, on New York Street, in room 13 there was a man laying unconscious in his bed, he was fairly short with blonde hair and slightly overweight, he looked than an ordinary middle aged man but in fact this was no ordinary man he was one of the smartest men alive, Adam Rider had been put into a coma in a car crash many years ago. Just a deaf man in a loincloth rushes into the room covered in grease yelling nonsense at the top of his voice and running round the room in a fit. A Few seconds later a Doctor is walking down the hall looking at some papers when he hears the uproar caused by the greased up deaf guy, he rushes to the store cupboard behind him and takes out brush and proceeds to run towards room 13. The doctor then attempts to get rid of the greased up deaf guy with his brush.

He turns round to check his patient who has just woke up,

'How are you feeling' the Doctor asks

'Fine just a little groggy, where am I?' Adam Replies

'You're in hospital, and I don't know how to tell this… so I'll let these guys do it'

At that moment a barbershop quartet consisting of five men run into the room and they begin to sing.

'You have Cancer, yes you have Cancer, I hate to tell you this but you have Cancer, that means there is tumour inside you, there's a tumour inside you, yes there's a tumour inside you, its in your lungs, because you have cancer, yes you have cancer, you know I hate to tell you this but you have cancer'

''WHAT, I have cancer' Adman exclaims at the Doctor

'Yes, I'm afraid so George'

'Wait a minute my name isn't George its Adam'

'What oh crap this is room 13 the guy with cancer is in room 12, I'm terribly sorry about this sir, right while I'm here I may as well sort you out'

'Ok Doctor so how am I doing?'

'Wow, you're Adam Rider, turns out you've been in a coma for 25 years, we weren't sure you'd actually recover we were begging to consider pulling the plug'

'Wow 25 Years, A lot must have changed'

'Yes now everyone is forced to ride unicycles and play the ukulele'

'What, Why'

'He he I'm just joking with you'

Adam Sweat drops and gets angry at the doctor for not taking his situation seriously

'So what major stuff has changed doctor?'

'Well if you've been in a coma for 25 years that means 12 years into your coma earth was vacated and we came to this planet which is a replica of earth on the other side of the sun, but this time we made the planet grand and we aren't going to let the same thing happen again, for example we recycle everything now and we manufactured ways to stop pollution, this place is as close to perfect as it can be'

'Wow if that's true then how did you get all the people and there calculators from the old earth to the new one'

'We didn't we took all the calculators and the best half of the people to here we left the useless and the unemployed on the wretched ball of filth that was old earth'

'I qualified as upper class?'

'Yes don't you remember you are a genius, one of the smartest men alive, of course you did?'

'I'm a genius, weird I don't feel all that smart, although I do have a strange craving for cheese and tea cakes'

'Well I guess you'll be cleared for departure tonight'

'Departure, don't you mean I'll be allowed to sign out'

'Uh yes of course, I used to be an aeroplane pilot'

'What happened to that job?'

'Hovercrafts were invented, and I may have crashed a plane, um anyway I'll come back to check on you later'

'Ok I'll see you later then Doctor'

'Yes now where'd that barbershop quartet go?'

Adam sweat drops and then lies back and decide to try and get some sleep.

Later that evening the Doctor returns and wakes Adam up.

'Adam good news I managed to find a friend of yours that works for NASA after a while of searching and I requested he come up to see you, I presume he will be able to sort you out and take care of you for a while'

'Thanks a lot Doctor, when will he be here'

'I don't know, best guess is sometime tonight'

'OK thanks see you later'

'Bye'

A Few Hours Later a tall thin man with short brown hair wearing a bright orange suit and a top hat walks into Adams room, he stands there for a minute and then with the ugliest smile you could ever see he exclaims

'Everything Ticketyboo'

'What?'

'You knew I was coming I presume'

'Yes I did know you were coming'

'Then why aren't you dressed and ready'

Adam doubted he had ever called this man friend but shakes the thought from his mind; he then gets dressed and leaves with the strange man who had announced his name was Norman.

'Were are we going' Asked Adam

'We are going to my house were you will most likely stay until you can sort yourself out' Norman replies

'If you really are my old friend what happened to rest of my old friends'

'The rest of your _friends_ were left behind, they were worthless'

'What! Are you serious, so you are the only _friend _I have left?'

'Yes can't you comprehend this simple conversation?'

Adam ignored this last remark and continued walking silently, and a while later they reached Normans house, a simple white painted terraced house with nothing special about it, that was until they got to the door, only just visible from the street was a complicated control panel on the right side of the door, Norman entered a code, had his eye scanned in it and then stated his name but as he did this a claw protracted from the wall and picked Adam up and started smashing him into the wall and then threw him back onto the street. Adam cautiously walked back up the path with a look of contempt on his face.

'What the bloody hell was that Norman you prat' He Yelled

'My Security system'

'Some bloody system'

At this Norman turned round to the speaker in the panel states and guest, at this the door opens and they both walk in. Norman shows Adam his room and they both sit down at the kitchen table.

'Would you like anything to eat or drink' Norman Asked

'No thanks, actually what are they on the table'

'Oh that's just a bag of cookies'

At this something runs into the kitchen grabs the cookies and runs yelling mine all the way.

'What was that' Adam asked astounded

'Oh that's just cookie monster, he just got out of rehab and he's living with me, although rehab doesn't seem to have affected him much'

'Damn this new world is strange'

'You haven't seen anything yet'


End file.
